The Power of Saying No in Youth Sports
By Emily Neff (Pappas), Ph.D.
If it feels like youth sports are more demanding than ever… you’re right.
Today, even 5-year-olds are playing soccer four days a week — three practices and a game every weekend. Compare that to 10–15 years ago, when kids played once or twice a week. The rise of year-round club teams, travel tournaments, and sport specialization has created a schedule that looks more like a full-time job than a childhood hobby.
Parents are juggling endless practices, doubleheader weekends, and pressure from every direction. It’s no wonder so many say:
“We’d love to make time for strength training, but there’s just no room in the schedule.”
The truth is — you don’t need more time. You need to protect the time that matters most.
The Hidden Cost of “Yes”
Saying “yes” to every game, clinic, and extra practice might feel like the safe choice. After all, no one wants their daughter to “fall behind.”
But the real risk isn’t missing one game.
👉 It’s her body breaking down before she ever reaches the opportunities she’s working so hard for.
The research is clear:
Overuse injuries account for nearly half of all youth sport injuries (DiFiori et al., 2014).
Girls in particular are at higher risk of ACL injuries, with rates 2–8x higher than boys in the same sports (Arendt & Dick, 1995; Myer et al., 2008).
Burnout drives 70% of kids to quit organized sports by age 13 (Aspen Institute Project Play, 2019).
And as USA Today recently reported, the push toward year-round play and overscheduling is leaving many athletes overbooked and overwhelmed — with long-term consequences for their health and love of the game (Evans, 2025).
In other words — saying yes to everything increases the chance she won’t be playing at all by the time it matters most.
Why Saying No Is the Strongest Choice
College coaches aren’t recruiting the 13-year-old who logged the most games.
They’re recruiting the 18-year-old who is still strong, healthy, and competing at a high level.
That requires parents to make courageous choices:
Saying no to the fourth clinic of the week.
Saying no to back-to-back tournaments.
Saying yes to rest, recovery, and strength.
Saying “no” isn’t quitting — it’s protecting her future.
Why Strength Training Needs to Be Non-Negotiable
Strength training 1–2x per week is not “optional.” It’s essential.
Evidence shows:
Neuromuscular training programs (including strength, plyometrics, and movement mechanics) can cut ACL injury risk in half (Sugimoto et al., 2015).
Just 2 sessions per week of targeted strength training improves performance metrics like sprint speed and jump height in youth athletes (Behringer et al., 2010).
Resistance training enhances bone density, tendon resilience, and overall durability — exactly what overloaded schedules erode (Faigenbaum et al., 2009).
As USA Today highlighted, experts overwhelmingly agree that supervised strength training is not only safe for young athletes but one of the best tools to prevent injury and support long-term development (Brennan, 2023).
In short: if youth sports demand more than ever, then athletes need more protection than ever. That protection comes from strength.
How to Say No (Parent Language Guide)
Parents often feel guilty pushing back on a coach’s schedule. Here are simple ways to reframe:
“We’re protecting her long-term health, so she won’t be at every optional practice.”
“She’s committed to strength training 1–2x per week because it prevents injury and keeps her strong for the team.”
“Our priority is keeping her healthy enough to play not just this season, but for years to come.”
These aren’t excuses.
They’re smart, research-backed boundaries.
WHEN PARENTS SAY “NO,” SHE GETS TO SAY YES
Youth sports are asking more of kids than ever before. If we want them to keep playing, we can’t just keep saying yes.
We have to prioritize the things that keep their bodies safe and their love for sport alive.
Strength training 1–2x per week is one of the most important investments parents can make. It’s not about doing more. It’s about choosing better.
References:
Arendt, E., & Dick, R. (1995). Knee injury patterns among men and women in collegiate basketball and soccer: NCAA data and review of literature. The American Journal of Sports Medicine, 23(6), 694–701. https://doi.org/10.1177/03635465950230061
Aspen Institute Project Play. (2019). State of play 2019: Trends and developments. Aspen Institute. https://www.aspenprojectplay.org
Behringer, M., Vom Heede, A., Yue, Z., & Mester, J. (2010). Effects of resistance training in children and adolescents: A meta-analysis. Pediatrics, 126(5), e1199–e1210. https://doi.org/10.1542/peds.2010-0445
Brennan, C. (2023, July 15). Weight lifting for youth athletes: When should teenagers start? USA Today. https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/2023/07/15/weight-lifting-for-youth-athletes-when-should-teenagers-start/70417007007/
DiFiori, J. P., Benjamin, H. J., Brenner, J., Gregory, A., Jayanthi, N., Landry, G. L., & Luke, A. (2014). Overuse injuries and burnout in youth sports: A position statement from the American Medical Society for Sports Medicine. Clinical Journal of Sport Medicine, 24(1), 3–20. https://doi.org/10.1097/JSM.0000000000000060
Evans, J. (2025, September 27). How much is too much? Is overbooking best for youth sports? USA Today. https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/high-school/2025/09/27/how-much-is-too-much-is-overbooking-best-for-youth-sports/86374280007/
Faigenbaum, A. D., Kraemer, W. J., Blimkie, C. J. R., Jeffreys, I., Micheli, L. J., Nitka, M., & Rowland, T. W. (2009). Youth resistance training: Updated position statement paper from the National Strength and Conditioning Association. Journal of Strength and Conditioning Research, 23(5 Suppl), S60–S79. https://doi.org/10.1519/JSC.0b013e31819df407
Myer, G. D., Ford, K. R., Paterno, M. V., Nick, T. G., & Hewett, T. E. (2008). The incidence and potential pathomechanics of patellofemoral pain in female athletes. Clinical Biomechanics, 23(7), 859–867. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.clinbiomech.2008.04.001
Sugimoto, D., Myer, G. D., McKeon, J. M., & Hewett, T. E. (2015). Evaluation of the effectiveness of neuromuscular training to reduce ACL injury in female athletes: A critical review. British Journal of Sports Medicine, 49(5), 282–289. https://doi.org/10.1136/bjsports-2014-093461
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Emily is the Owner and Program Director at Relentless.
Emily holds a Ph.D. in Kinesiology with a research focus on female athletes & the relationship between Olympic Weightlifting, performance, and ACL injury rates in adolescent female athletes. She holds an M.S. in Exercise Physiology from Temple University and a B.S. in Biological Sciences from Drexel University.
Through this education, Emily values her ability to coach athletes and develop strength coaches, using a perspective grounded in biochemistry and human physiology.
In 2015, Emily opened Relentless Athletics to create a community for female athletes, while educating their parents and coaches on the importance of strength training and sports nutrition in optimizing sports performance and reducing injury risks in the female athlete population.
When she isn’t on the coaching floor or doing work behind the scenes, she is at home with her husband, two kids, and of course, their dog Milo!
